Study, Revisited
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I'm taking the GRE today. I took it several years ago, but it's been so long that I don't remember my scores and they wouldn't count for the programs I'm applying to anyway. I think I'll do well. I just need to relax and do the test, not worry about what happens after that. The further I go on the journey of pursuing a doctoral degree the narrower our path becomes, for lots of reasons, and I have decided to believe that God is directing each step of the journey.
It seems following God's call is often like that. It's like being in a desert and hearing a voice in the distant mountains. You journey toward the voice, but you must enter the hills before you really know which mountain He is calling from. So, you start climbing hills in the general direction of the call. Sometimes you move forward, sometimes sideways, sometimes you back up and travel through a valley to get to a third point beyond the rises on either side. It's a pathless journey at first, full of the marks others have left behind and void of any indication of whether those marks apply to you as well.
As you travel, a road begins to form. The way is steeper, but the air is also clearer. The rises on either side are more intimidating, but the view is better: greener and more full of life. It takes longer to cover less distance, but you spend less time on side trails and dead ends. Your trepidation is no less, but the path under your feet is gradually more certain. You are in the mountains, and as the voice echoes off the valley walls you pray that it's coming from above you and not from across the valley. So, you trust the path until it brings you to a place where the voice is more certain. You are on the path, and hopefully it is the right one.
At some point the voice rings out clearly again. It may come from further up the path, from a side road, or unfortunately from another mountain. Wherever it comes from, you move toward it. It may be further up the path, across to the next mountain top (but with more confidence and speed), or off the path into the uncharted territory. Eventually the path will fade, slowly or suddenly, and you'll be guided only by the voice again, His call. You'll follow the voice until it takes you to the next starting place. At the top of the mountain you'll step out onto the sky itself, a new wilderness, a different kind of adventure, one that would have seemed impossible before.
In this way, we follow God's voice from calling to calling as He leads us ever upward and onward, higher and deeper. Through following, we become stronger, more secure, more certain of the voice. We start to become . . . more. More of who God is calling us to be. More of ourself. More like Him.
I've followed the voice before. I've studied before. I've taken tests before. I've even taken this particular test before! Yet, I don't feel as if I'm going backwards. I'm not just retracing my steps. I'm on a different mountain now. I have a more certain calling. My life is more than it was, and I am more as well. I am Bryan 2010: follower of Christ, husband, father, friend, disciple, student, and teacher. I am on a journey to who I will be tomorrow and forever. I have followed God's voice, and He is making me more like Himself.
.
I'm taking the GRE today. I took it several years ago, but it's been so long that I don't remember my scores and they wouldn't count for the programs I'm applying to anyway. I think I'll do well. I just need to relax and do the test, not worry about what happens after that. The further I go on the journey of pursuing a doctoral degree the narrower our path becomes, for lots of reasons, and I have decided to believe that God is directing each step of the journey.
It seems following God's call is often like that. It's like being in a desert and hearing a voice in the distant mountains. You journey toward the voice, but you must enter the hills before you really know which mountain He is calling from. So, you start climbing hills in the general direction of the call. Sometimes you move forward, sometimes sideways, sometimes you back up and travel through a valley to get to a third point beyond the rises on either side. It's a pathless journey at first, full of the marks others have left behind and void of any indication of whether those marks apply to you as well.
As you travel, a road begins to form. The way is steeper, but the air is also clearer. The rises on either side are more intimidating, but the view is better: greener and more full of life. It takes longer to cover less distance, but you spend less time on side trails and dead ends. Your trepidation is no less, but the path under your feet is gradually more certain. You are in the mountains, and as the voice echoes off the valley walls you pray that it's coming from above you and not from across the valley. So, you trust the path until it brings you to a place where the voice is more certain. You are on the path, and hopefully it is the right one.
At some point the voice rings out clearly again. It may come from further up the path, from a side road, or unfortunately from another mountain. Wherever it comes from, you move toward it. It may be further up the path, across to the next mountain top (but with more confidence and speed), or off the path into the uncharted territory. Eventually the path will fade, slowly or suddenly, and you'll be guided only by the voice again, His call. You'll follow the voice until it takes you to the next starting place. At the top of the mountain you'll step out onto the sky itself, a new wilderness, a different kind of adventure, one that would have seemed impossible before.
In this way, we follow God's voice from calling to calling as He leads us ever upward and onward, higher and deeper. Through following, we become stronger, more secure, more certain of the voice. We start to become . . . more. More of who God is calling us to be. More of ourself. More like Him.
I've followed the voice before. I've studied before. I've taken tests before. I've even taken this particular test before! Yet, I don't feel as if I'm going backwards. I'm not just retracing my steps. I'm on a different mountain now. I have a more certain calling. My life is more than it was, and I am more as well. I am Bryan 2010: follower of Christ, husband, father, friend, disciple, student, and teacher. I am on a journey to who I will be tomorrow and forever. I have followed God's voice, and He is making me more like Himself.
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